Updated: Feb 3
The month of January seems to have been a never-ending month to me, however, this year, this particular month of January, flew by very quickly. Is it just me that feels this way?
The impact of the month was felt in such a profound way for me because my month began with some residual depression I was suffering from the month prior, and because of the "to-do" list I created to help kick off the new year. Although I accomplished 3 out of the 5 goals this month, I still felt so under-accomplished. Yes, I know, I am very hard on myself, and during my self care journey, I plan on giving myself more grace, as my bestie, Lorraine, always reminds me to do.
While battling what seems to have been the rest of the depression (I no longer claim it as "mine"), I still made attempts to intentionally show up for myself, my family & friends, keep my personal boundaries up, get closer to God, and remind myself that no matter what, I got this and I will come through the other side better than ever before.
The beginning of this month has not only been challenging for me, but also for some of my friends who are mourning different people and experiences in their lives. So, more prayer than usual has definitely been taking place this month, which when you think about it in retrospect, an abundance of prayer can never be a bad thing, so it is truly welcomed and has been working in different, yet small ways, thus far. I absolutely know that the growing pains I'm experiencing has a lot to do with my thought process, how I speak to myself, the patience & grace I find difficult to give myself, and me learning how to lean and rely on God more than ever before.
To assist in my journey, a friend and now spiritual sister of mine, introduced me to a new online church, Transformation Church led by Pastor Michael & Natalie Todd in Tulsa, OK, and their well illustrated sermons has helped me a lot along this journey. So much so that I have shared the church with many friends, and on my social media pages. Pastor Todd has a new series entitled "Anchored by God," which is so powerful & provides the necessary tidbits to keep me grounded in the Word of God as I go through this journey, and I encourage you to tap into his services. With having the combination of him, Bishop T.D Jakes & Joel Osteen, I have the spiritual backbone set in place to assist me through my journey. No matter how trying it can be to unlearn some things that I have been doing, that has kept me stagnant, one thing is for sure, the end result will make this discomfort worth all the painful moments of growth.
In order to reverse the sporadic depression bouts, I have decided to do something about it. Before sharing a Saturday brunch filled with belly-laughs with a girl friend, I decided to create a new challenge for myself, which I plan to help me transition into February and the rest of the year with ease; I call it the #intentionalhappiness challenge. Each day, I will make it my business to do at least one thing that makes me genuinely happy; something that puts a smile on my face or makes me experience more of those belly laughs. That feeling that comes as a result of me deciding to fix my mindset to be intentionally happy feels so good that I told myself that I want to keep this feeling going, and so, I am.
My question is, will you join me? If so, all I ask is that you post yourself on social media doing, eating or drinking something that makes you genuinely happy, or share a picture or quote that provides that same sentiment, and use the hashtags: #intentionalhappinesschallenge and #acolorfuldreamer this way we can all be on a mission towards self-love & happiness, together!
Throughout this whole post, I heard in the back of my mind, one of my mother's favorite songs by Betty Wright which inspired the name of this post, "No Pain, No Gain." It simply reminds me, that if my muscles aren't sore after a workout, then I did not give it my all, I didn't go above and beyond, and I truly didn't show up for myself, and that I made a decision to be mediocre, something I never aspire to be in my life. So, in order to combat that feeling of mediocrity, I will continue to push through the pain no matter what!
In the end, I will be so happy to see the results of my self-love workout, and to know that I did not quit on myself. I truly hope you all can join me on this journey towards self-love and actualization.
No matter what, never forget to:
Lead with Love.
Your Dope Colorful Dreamer,